Don't Go - The Blue Grotto

In this series I tell you places to avoid based on my own experiences. They're over-rated, they're tourist traps and they're a waste of time. Do yourself a favor and learn from my mistakes, don't go!

La Grotta Azzurra, a name so alluring. Who wouldn't want to enter this mysterious cavern and see its crystal blue waters? You, I hope, after reading this. The Blue Grotto is by far the biggest tourist trap, and biggest racket, I have ever experienced in travel.

Is this how you want to spend your island vacation?

Here's the process: first you wait in line for a boat. This goes by rather quickly and you think, "oh, that wasn't bad, we'll be at the Blue Grotto in no time." Then you arrive and see about 25 other boats packed with people waiting in front of you. And in front of them, is a line of people coming from land going down the stairs. All of those people are getting in the Blue Grotto before you. Our wait was about two hours in total. One hour was in the hot sun with the boat shut off, rocking up and down on the waves. People were getting sick. Our driver was nice enough to move us into the shade, but then other boats came and did the same thing. So then we were all crammed against the rock, inhaling boat engine fumes for an hour. It was nauseating. 

Or this? My Mom and our hot Caprese tour guide.

When it's finally your turn to go into the Blue Grotto, you have to get on a smaller rowboat to make it through the tiny entryway. But the first boat ticket you bought doesn't cover that, so you have to pay for a second boat ticket. Plus admission to the Blue Grotto. Plus tax. Plus tip. After all that, they bring you inside for seriously about 1 minute. Just enough time to take a couple of pictures and turn around. It's crowded and loud in there too. And the kicker is, it's so dark inside you can barely see anything! The blue water will show up in photographs if you use an extended flash, but you won't see it with your own eyes. If you want to experience clear blue water for a fraction of the price, install 2000 flushes and take a picture of your toilet bowl. Your time is much better spent taking a private boat tour around the Faraglioni (above). As you can see, the scenery is gorgeous, and the Faraglioni aren't bad either. 

Leaning Tower of Prosciutto

There are many wonderful reasons that people flock to Capri, but the crowds can make you feel like you're in Disneyland, not a blissful Italian island. One way to escape the bustle and capture the island's true essence is to spend time in Anacapri ("above Capri"). You'll enjoy sweeping views from the Marina Grande all the way out to Vesuvius, and have plenty of peace, quiet and space all to yourself. You might even happen upon a local wedding reception featuring a mind-blowing culinary and architectural wonder.

High up in Anacapri, on Viale Tommaso De Tommasi, you are faced with a decision. You can either take the bus down to the Blue Grotto for hours of hell, or step into the unassuming Trattoria Al Nido D'oro, and taste heaven.

Crazy for Caprese, Anacapri

Payback is a Beach!

I received my Foreign Currency Fee Litigation Settlement check today. Yeah, it's a mouthful. And yes, they are real! Apparently us travelers were ripped off a few years back on currency conversion fees by credit card companies. I know, shocking right?
I have no idea how much I was actually overcharged, the trip is long gone and paid for. But I did receive my $18.04 in the mail today. I'm pretty sure it was from my 2005 Italy trip. I doubt it covers all that I was overcharged, but it is like someone just put a little cappuccino and cannoli in my mailbox. A good reminder to always be aware of the fees and charges associated with using credit cards and ATMs while overseas. When it comes to ATMs, I always try to make as few withdrawals as possible to avoid the fees. Yes, this means traveling with more cash on me, but that's also why I keep it in a money belt in my underwear.  As for the check, I'll be putting it in the kitty for a 2012 vacation. Payback's a beach!

Rome If You Want To...

The following is an e-mail I sent to family and friends during my May 2005 trip to Italy and Sicily.

Ciao Amici!

Warm - make that hot, very hot - greetings from Italy, where the Atkins diet has not quite caught on yet. I swear, trying to find a salad here is like a detour challenge straight out of The Amazing Race. I can just hear host Phil Keoghan say: "Teams must now navigate the hot, narrow streets of Rome in search of fresh lettuce... the last team to find it will be eliminated."

Here is my interpretation of the Italian food pyramid:

                                                      Gelato
                                           Espresso/Cappuccino
                                      B r e a d / R o l l s / P i z z a
                                  P          A          S          T          A

As for the transportation, since we've been here, there has been a train strike, a vaporetto strike (those are the water buses in Venice) and believe it or not, they discovered a WW2 bomb under the train tracks between Rome and Naples which forced us to take a different train - the slowest train in the world. It made Muni (SF) seem like Nascar. After sitting still on the tracks for most of the day, we finally started moving... backwards. Ah, all in a day's travel in Italy!

Anyway, I'm probably making it sound much worse than it's actually been. Highlights of the trip so far include flying over the Dolomites and having an aerial view of Venice before landing at Marco Polo airport, being invited into the home of a little old Italian woman for a cold drink in Burano, being flashed by a young man in the very same Burano, driving through Rome at night listening to Cyndi Lauper's "Time After Time", and seeing the new Pope, Papa Benedetto, in St. Peter's Square.

I didn't think I would be that excited to see him because he isn't John Paul II, but for one thing, from where we were standing they look exactly the same! And besides, when he came out and zoomed around the square in his Pope-mobile, organ music blasting and people going crazy - it was like being at a rock concert. Popestock, I guess.

The very next night my Mom was driving around Rome with a friend when they were stuck in a traffic jam caused by the Pope's procession. Looking out the window she saw a bunch of people standing around by the car waiting for the jam to clear, and one of them was actor Willem Dafoe! So she rolled down the window and said, "Se grande!" - "You're great!" and he shook her hand. So there you go, she saw the Pope AND Jesus while in Rome.

Anyway, I didn't think that could be topped, but it was - two nights later in Capua, an area outside of Naples where part of my family comes from. We have been staying with a friend of my Mom's, and we actually had the chance to chat with my Dad via webcam from here to Ontario, NY. I'll bet my ancestors could have never imagined that happening in their wildest dreams! (And props to my Dad for handling those Mary Kay orders while my Mom is out of the country.)

This just in... I just got back from dinner where I finally managed to get a salad... of course it was on top of a pizza, but one can't be picky. The girl next to me got a pizza that was COVERED in french fries. South Beach it ain't.

Alright, I have to get going... I'm exhausted, I have mosquito bites on my face and cappuccino stains on my jeans. Tomorrow we're off to Capri and after that it's on to Sicily! I'll see if I can find a copy of the Sicilian food pyramid, but I have a feeling it looks something like a bunch of stacked cannoli.

As I used to say in the 4th grade,
Ciao for now!
Love,
Tootsie